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The Expendables 2: Return of the Movie Testosterone Treatment

18 Jan

Many of you have heard at some time or another the many commercials promoting therapy for men dealing with low testosterone.  Well, you may not need to spend hours at a clinical facility or spend tons of money on these treatments.  My course of treatment, I submit to you, is watch “The Expendables” followed by “The Expendables 2”.  Why, you may ask?  Well, the following review should help enlighten and show why these movies can help fill that void for you.

For those of us who grew up in the 80’s and even the 90s, we had such action heroes like Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Van Damme, Lundgren, Willis, among others, and to this day we love to watch their movies.  The movies are filled with massive explosions, impossible scenarios, and enough violence and one liners to keep your manliness flaring.  For the most part, these actors have been able to keep a steady stream of movies, with some deviating to different genres over the years.  But at the end of the day, we love to see them blow stuff up, plain and simple.

“The Expendables 2” gives you a story, sure…I mean, every movie should have a plot right?  But you came to see all of these big guns come together to smoke cigars, use some really big guns, and continuously fight the bad guys to save the day.  Ask and you shall receive…

What makes the movie successful is the fact that they don’t try to be something they aren’t.  They don’t try to throw a long lost love story into the mix, or have some elaborate addition of some supernatural force to an already fine sci-fi story element (yes, I’m talking to you “Looper”).  The movie has it all, massive explosions, huge blood splatters, and also does what more films need to do, be fun!  There is some really great humor, and probably the best times are the lines where they are making fun of each others old one liners.

Trench (Schwarzenegger): “I’ll be back.”Church (Willis): “You’ve been back enough.  I’ll be back.”
[Church leaves]
Trench: “Yippee-ki-yay.”

Their exchanges made the movie for me, oh…and Chuck Norris…

*EXPLODES FROM THE LEVEL OF AWESOME THAT WAS JUST EXPRESSED*

Yes, Chuck Norris has what I thought a rather humorous cameo and even has the time to make a Chuck Norris joke.  Though you’ll have to see it, or cheat and google it, you cheater you…

So if you were a fan of “Predator”, “Die Hard”, “Universal Soldier”, “The Punisher” (not to be mistaken with the fairly decent remake with Thomas Jane), or you just like to see guys with guns and bombs, then this is the movie for you.

Disclaimer: And your testosterone levels may or may not increase while or after watching this film.

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Posted by on January 18, 2013 in Redbox: $1 Movies FTW

 

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